Seven players were present:
- Garrus Ironside,
Male Dwarf Cleric - Ffion Tanwen,
Female Dragonborn Cleric - Dimva Murkahm,
Male Dwarf Rogue - Mortos,
Male Tiefling Druid - Erith Elmaris,
Male Elf Druid - Amidaeus,
Female Elf Rogue - Lupin Damakos,
Female Tiefling Rogue + Willow, Cat Animal Companion
Editor’s Note: When we last left our five players, Lupin, Dimva, and Mortos were attempting to brave the stairwell laden with invisible spider-web traps, while Garrus and Ffion stayed behind. Amidaeus and Erith were once again able to join this session. Given a choice of where they wanted to start, Erith went with the group braving the stairs, and Amidaeus chose to hang out at the bar in the reception hall. We now resume our regular scheduled broadcast, already in progress.
The Feral Female relates that she was not always a Vampire. Born to a minor merchant family, she was raised by a brutish father who wished to use her to marry into a prominent family in an attempt to raise their status. When she refused, she was beaten by both her father and her new husband. Fleeing from her abusive marriage, she was captured and turned by a Vampire who tormented and used her as a plaything for nearly a century. Training herself in the art of swordsmanship in secret for decades, she bided her time. Slaying her surprised master, Vanessa vowed to never be dominated by another man.
The Vixen Vampire offers Amidaeus a chance to never be abused by a man again. She claims she will turn her into a Vampire, but release her from her servitude. Amidaeus wants to know why she would extend this offer, and what’s in it for her. The Femme Fatal proclaims that whatever differences they may have, they still share a bond as women; women who have been abused by men. She tells Amidaeus that becoming a Vampire will give her power beyond belief, power that will allow her to never suffer abuse at the hands of anyone, ever again. Amidaeus tells her that she will think about it. The Sexy Succubus tells her that if she agrees, it should be before she gets another black eye or broken tooth, since that would not be a good look to sport for all eternity. She then rises and saunters back into the crowd.
Seated next to Amidaeus, Garrus and Ffion overhear everything and can’t believe she would even consider the offer. Amidaeus actually seems to be mulling the idea over. Garrus tries to dissuade her; he asks why she thinks Vanessa will even keep her promise? The Pious Priest reminds her that she slayed the Accountess at their Board Meeting (see Deadly Persuasion). Amidaeus states that her offer seemed genuinely heartfelt as a fellow abused woman. She then asks Ffion for her opinion as a woman. The Powerful Priestess is wary of the offer, but declares that it is a choice she must make on her own. Amidaeus claims that becoming a Vampire could help in their fight against the Crimson Empire. Garrus reluctantly agrees that it might be helpful. Amidaeus adds that as a bonus, she would stay young and glittery forever, like a Twilight Vampire. Garrus admits that Vanessa is “easy on the eyes”. From across the room, Vanessa yells out: “Men!!!”
The Pretty Performer proclaims that you enter a complete state of euphoria, the highest of highs, at the slightest taste. The Wonderous Warbler warns that one must be careful not to ingest too much at a time, or one could easily become addicted. The Lovely Lyricist lets him know that if he’s interested, to contact her agent and maybe they can set up a sampling. Garrus is intrigued and thanks her.
Babs proclaims she’s tired of only hearing about adventures and wants to join them. Ffion is concerned and Amidaeus is especially wary, since she likes Babs, and their track record with NPCs isn’t that great. Garrus inquires what an NPC is. The Marvelous Mixologist cajoles her way to joining them, claiming that they have no responsibility for whatever happens to her. And besides, what safer place could there be than between two Clerics (That. . . that. . . that just sounds so wrong.)? Summoning another caterer to take over the bar, the Wary Waitress watches, waits, and walks The Heroes to the stairwell passageway.
Lupin’s agility and dexterity are strained to the max, as she twist and turns, limbos and contorts her way through the maze of webs (players had to make three dexterity rolls to simulate traversing the web traps).
As Lupin exits the stairwell safely in relief, Dimva tumbles down the remaining stairs. Bowling Lupin over, luck finally favors Dimva, as Lupin’s inert form ends up cushioning his descent.
Shoving Dimva off her back, the four companions are confronted with an ancient stone chamber. In the center of the room, sitting just beneath the end of a mile-long conduit of natural pumice and sandstone, stands a pedestal supporting a large glass container . Hanging from the ceiling, the giant golden amber teardrop of Ambrosia has completed its’ year-long journey and is formed and ready to drop. Surrounding the pedestal is a mystic barrier which encircles the column from floor to ceiling.
Mortos turns into a bat and hangs out on the ceiling. Erith also turns into a bat and surveys the room from the air. In the darkened corridor to the far right, he notices a large shadow. Afraid to investigate further, he flies to Lupin’s side to report, then rejoins Mortos on the entryway’s ceiling. On the opposite side of the barrier, Lupin finds some ancient glyphs. Unable to read them, she scratches at them in the hope that their destruction will activate something.
Aimed to the ground, The Heroes are able to travel downward 20 feet at a time. Unfortunately, it takes 10 minuets for the spell to recharge, so it takes three turns to catch up to the other Heroes. (Editor’s note: “But you said the Ambrosia travels through a mile of pumice and sandstone. A mile is much more than 60 feet.” The Ambrosia travels through a twisting and twirling turbulent trail [Think of a coiled rope]. If it was indeed a straight 5,280 foot drop, which would be about four times the height of the Willis [Sears] Tower, The Heroes would be slowly descending trap-laden stairs for days. We regret any confusion this may have caused.)
At that moment, the rest of The Heroes materialize on the stairway. Dimva warns them that many of the floor tiles are trapped. The sounds and voices of the reunited Heroes awakens the hulking shadow in the corridor. A ginormous Spider emerges from the shadows and charges The Heroes. At the sight of the Colossal Creature, Lupin decides to turn invisible.
The Sinister Spider strikes, launching an array of deadly eyebeams, The Heroes are barraged by the deadly magical blasts. Dimva is burned by a scorching ray. An Acid ray scores a critical hit on Garrus, severely wounding him. Amidaeus is struck by a ray of frost. Ffion is also struck by a scorching ray, but her fire resistance lessens the damage.
Garrus yells for everyone to take cover in some of the closed chambers. Erith, Ffion and Babs dash for a door, but Mortos races up to the Big Bug. Inside the barrier, an invisible Lupin switches her Spider Boots for her Boots of Teleportation. Casting a mighty spell, Mortos hurls the Spooky Spider backwards, into a prone position.
With the threat of the Super-Sized Spider suspended, Garrus examines the ancient glyphs behind the barrier. Etched in an old Dwarven dialect, Garrus is just barely able to translate the ruins. They are a series of puns about St. Patrick’s Day.
1: Spotted Feline Prisoner.*
2: Fraudulent Stone.**
3: Cow on a Cob.***
4: Taxi Chest Pin.****
5: Watery Jig.*****
6: Shinny Yellow Marijuana.******
7: Precipitation in a Knot.*******
8: Equestrian Footwear.********
9: Skeletal Girl.*********
10: Quad Petaled Plant.**********
11: Verdant Ale.***********
12: Original Obi Wan.************
The Heroes are shocked when it is revealed that Crystal was really three female Halflings standing on each other’s shoulders. The two remaining Halflings are furious over their sister’s death and order the others to kill The Heroes. Mortos rushes up to the Halflings to preempt their attack.
With the threat of the Larva Mage ended, the Band of Thieves resumes attacking The Heroes. The two Horrible Halflings slash at Mortos with daggers, while the Dangerous Dwarf, wielding two clubs, attacks Amidaeus and Dimva. The Hateful Half-Elf charges with a sword toward Erith, Ffion and Babs. Transmogrifying into a Ladybug, Erith flies over and devours the helpless Larva Mage in Aphid form.
To Bee continued? ? ?
Lupin was quite determined to complete her heist. Using just about every trick she had, from her goggles and dexterity to evade the trapped stairwell, to her spider boots, teleportation and invisibility, she managed to obtain the Ambrosia. She even managed to land the death blow on the giant Spider. She thought teleporting to the ship would cease any hostilities between Crystal and her companions, but that wasn’t quite how it turned out. Garrus was extremely concerned over Amidaeus’ offer from Vanessa and tried to talk her out of it. His interaction with Crystal, and many of the guest, showcased that he is always trying to gather information. Using the passwall spell in a downward direction was a clever way to bypass the stairway traps. He also proved himself quite the brawler, as well as a healer, in both the battles with the Spider and the Band of Thieves. Dimva was actually late arriving to the session. Another player rolled for his dexterity checks, as I described his precarious plunge down the stairway. I was somewhat surprised that he wasn’t more aggressive about obtaining the Ambrosia. He did show his courage by attacking the Spider when Garrus was in trouble as well as battling the Dwarven band member. His use of the ring from Lady Die against Crystal was unexpected (absolutely NOT how the ring was supposed to work), but served as an awesome way to reveal her secret. Erith seems to enjoy having another Druid around. They shared many of the same transmutations and spells throughout the session. Each one ready to cover for the other if he failed. Using a drama card to call forth a foe to attack the Band of Thieves was a brilliant idea. However, it didn’t turn out completely as planned when the Larva Mage attacked EVERYONE. This is the second time Erith ended the threat of a polymorphed villain by devouring him (see Family Feud). I had plans for Amidaeus last session, but she couldn’t make it. With her return this session, I was able to allow Vanessa to proposition her to become a vampire. This was primarily to flesh out Vanessa and make her a more sympathetic character. I never thought Amidaeus would seriously consider it. But it does make sense, after her abuse from the hands of her former lover. It will be interesting to see what choice she makes. She also showed a caring side when she tried to dissuade Babs from joining in the dangerous mission. After hesitating in battle the last few sessions, she showed great bravery when she came to Garrus’ aid against the giant Spider and battling the Dwarven band member with Dimva. Though she was in opposition to Vanessa’s offer, Ffion played the part of a counselor and, like the best professionals, advised Amidaeus that the choice was hers alone. When the Spider attacked, Ffion showed how having two Clerics in the group can be quite beneficial. Giving her party advantages on attacks as well as healing helped keep everyone near full health. When Garrus was hit with two horrific critical hits, Ffion was able to bring him back to health like the best PPO. She also proved herself in combat when battling the Half-Elf. Mortos spent much of his time in various insect or animal forms. He was quite brave facing off against the Spider head to head. His powerful spell actually sent the Spider flying off the board and landing in a prone position. His Baleful Polymorph quickly ended the threat of the Larva Mage. (As a DM, I have a love/hate relation with that spell. It neutralizes powerful foes way too quick, but at the same time, it’s a beautiful thing to see.) He also showed great daring by taking on the two Halflings by himself. His suggestion for either Erith or himself to morph into the Larva Mage so the wedding can proceed was the funniest moment of the night. Bravo to all!!!
Who are the Larva Mage and Queen Saphire?—The Heroes encountered the Larva mage way back in No Small Feat. A foe from Egnarts’ past, this Maggot Mage was shrunk down and trapped in a specimen jar for decades, until The Heroes freed him. They actually formed an uneasy alliance and defeated the Lich King and Ghost Beholder together before he departed. Queen Sapphire was introduced in Deadly Persuasion. A Vapid Valley Girl, she and Zanna quickly became BFFs. When the Board Meeting erupted, the Queen Bee decided she had had enough of the Crimson Empire and tried to flee with Zanna. Her reaction to what just transpired will be revealed in our next session.
° This event was inspired by a Drama card. I am so glad players are, finally, actively using them.
* Spotted Feline Prisoner: Spotted feline=leopard; prisoner=con—Leprechaun.
** Fraudulent Stone: Fraud=sham; stone=rock—Shamrock.
*** Cow on a Cob: Cow=beef; on a cob=corn—Corned Beef.
**** Taxi Chest Pin: Taxi=cab; chest pin = badge—Cabbage.
***** Watery Jig: Watery=river; jig=dance—River Dance.
****** Shinny Yellow Marijuana: Shinny yellow=gold; marijuana=pot—Pot of Gold.
******* Precipitation in a Knot: Precipitation=rain; knot=bow—Rainbow.
******** Equestrian Footwear: Equestrian=horse; footwear=shoe—Horseshoe.
********* Skeletal Girl: Skeletal=boney; girl=lass—Bonnie Lass.
********** Quad Petaled Plant: Quad=four; petaled=leaf; plant=clover—Four-leafed Clover.
*********** Verdant Ale: Verdant=green; ale=beer—Green Beer.
************ Original Obi Wan: (Alec) Guinness.
Next: Chapter 52 - Hopes & Fears
Previous: Chapter 50 - Hive Mentality