- Dimva Murkahm, Male Dwarf Rogue
- Amidaeus, Female Elf Rogue
- Lobis Thunderfoot, Male Gnome ????
- Henrick, Male Human Warlock
- Lupin Damakos, Female Tiefling Rogue + Willow, Cat Animal Companion
- Erith Elmaris, Male Elf Druid
Egnarts also thanks The Heroes for helping convince Lady Die to let him live out his remaining days as a mortal with Clea. He apologizes for the way he behaved in the past toward Lupin. An apology that Lupin scoffs at.
Before anyone else can react, Lupin uses her acrobatic skills and leaps upon the Buzzing Bee; jamming a shrinking potion into its monstrous mandibles. Shrunk to the size of a normal hornet, the Tiny Terror is forced to flee as Hendrick burst into a slow clap of admiration.
The usually jovial Egad seems downcast as they proceed toward the Orc encampment. When questioned why, Egad laments that he always hoped that he would wed Princess Buttercup one day. Amidaeus informs him that he may yet have a chance. At that moment, Erith and Dimva catch up to the group (Players came online). Lobis acts as if he has never seen a Dwarf before as he gapes at him. A bemused Dimva calls him “Sonny” and tells him to call him “Pops”.
HORRIBLE NUMBER 5 PUNS
(Puns are things that come in 5’s, or have the number 5 in its name.)
Groups of 5:
1: Non-Consonants.*
2: Better than Good Bodies of Water.**
3: Used to Percieve.***
4: Walls of a Military Complex.****
5: Hand Digits.*****
Number 5 in name:
6: Stubble on Face.******
7: Michael and His Brothers.*******
8: Short Rest.********
9: Perfume.*********
10: Sci-Fi Space Station.**********
11: Subway Sale.***********
12: Island State’s Police.************
A perplexed Lobis enquires why she is here. The Dark Damsel replies that she is here representing the Drow Elves. Still rocking Lobis, she asks if he remembers how they defeated a Beholder together when they first met. Hoisting a metal orb at the end of her necklace, the Effervescent Elf proclaims that she still has one of its eyes. Lobis recalls a slightly different version, and asks how she got it and where she disappeared to during the battle. The Stunning Sorceress says she plucked its eye out while it was sleeping, then went searching for treasure while Lobis bravely held it off. She didn’t want to deprive her little hero of the kill.
The Elegant Eladrin demands to know what Lupin is attempting to pull off at the wedding. A haughty Lupin replies that she is now a member of the United and that they are here on a mission to insure nothing interferes with the wedding. She then thanks her for her comfortable boots. The Warrior Woman smiles and warns that she’ll be keeping her eye on her. As she walks off, a concerned Hendrick want to know who she is. Lupin replies that she is just someone from her past.
Deftly plucking a coin purse, he is surprised when a hand grabs his wrist. It is a female human rogue, Scarlet (see Perfidia). She gleefully greets the shocked Dimva and introduces him to her fiancé, Pyter. Dimva hems and haws and tries to depart by mentioning that he forgot to bring a gift. Scarlet giggles and insist that Pyter hand him a pouch. A dumbstruck but grateful Dimva thanks them and bids the coosome twosome farewell. Scarlet tells him to think nothing of it. Inspecting the contents of the purloined purses, he discovers 200 gold coins.
As Amidaeus searches for Ironfist, she is approached from behind. Turning, she sees a familiar face; an Elven Rogue named Malachi from Bentum.
Malachi knows what she is planning. He urges her not to go through with her scheme. He claims she is surrounded by Orcs and members of the United and has no escape plan. She refuses to listen, accusing Malachi of deserting her. He claims that she left him, obsessed with vengeance. Amidaeus hisses that she will avenge her parent’s deaths by killing Ironfist.
Amidaeus doesn’t seem to care. Her moment is almost upon her and she storms away from Lupin with a determined stride.
Amedaeus is somewhat startled as Ironfist joins her at the altar. Grunting an acknowledgement, he tells her that he is surprised they sent an elf cleric. Sniffing the air, he tells her that she somehow smells familiar.
Sent to ensure that nothing goes wrong with the wedding, a shocked Lobis attempts to capture Amidaeus before the Orcs. Lobis leaps at Amidaeus and is caught by her in mid-air. She twirls him about as the band begins to play “I’ve had the Time of my Life”.
Apprehending her, a furious Sariel tells Lupin that she can’t believe she would be part of an assassination plot. Henrick tries to intervene, but the Angered Eladin will have none of it, especially from someone wearing a demon’s skull for a hat. She promptly accuses all of The Heroes as accomplishes. As the flames begin to spread, Erith and Lupin begin to scream “fire” to draw attention away from Amidaeus.
As they are all honorable, barbaric, homicidal, savages, the Orcs all respect the right of revenge and mummer their approval. Since it would be a sin to let all this good food go to waste, they also agree to the newly arranged matrimony. Having indeed received her on-line minister’s degree, Amidaeus is able to officiate the wedding of the blushing bride and groom. As she is presenting the newlywed couple, bolts of necrotic energy begin to pummel the courtyard.
Malalachi makes a running jump and hurls himself and Amidaeus through a secret passage he had set up and slams the door behind them. (Player had to tend to a pet emergency. Out for the rest of the session). Gathering all her courage, Lupin attacks Wolfram from behind (she is deathly afraid of Liches). Lobis joins in for a pinchers movement and casts a spell, hurling Wolfram across the courtyard.
The Bodak approaches, emanating a necrotic aura that effects the Heroes. Erith is stunned and weakened by the aura. Dimva emerges from the crowd and fires his crossbow to no effect (Erith and Dimva’s player’s cell phone ran out of juice and they couldn’t find a charger right away). Wolfram returns to the fray pummeling The Heroes from afar with necrotic bolts.
With the Wicked Wizard fast approaching, Lupin uses a magical coin (a treasure from Dungeons and Darkness) to wish Wolfram dead. The Lich falls from the sky and crumbles to dust as he hits the ground.
Henrick is brought to the floor by a hurled rock, but Sariel bludgeons the Blackened Beast with her staff, buying him time to recover. Lobis manages to slay the Bodak and he and Lupin rush to aid Henrick. Seeing his comrades defeated, the Evil Ebony figure breaks free and scampers off into the woods.
The Lady Lawman mentions that there are always five members, and it is odd that there were only four of them today. The Pompous Princess proclaims that perhaps there is hope for Lupin after all. Lupin scoffs and tells her she doesn’t need her approval.
Buttercup and Egad express their gratitude for everything The Heroes have done and tell them to thank Amidaeus when they see her again. The Heroes then depart on their long trek back to the United Center.
To be continued? ? ?
Thoughts on this Session: Great session! Tons of role playing with a host of NPCs from many of The Heroes’ backstories (see the Guest List below for a complete who’s who). A finale to a storyline and characters begun years ago (see The Orc Princess Bride). Also, a resolution for both Amidaeus and the doubly deceased Wanda (General Nagleth Ironfist was responsible for the death of both Amidaeus’ parents and Wanda’s family). Amedaeus gave a bravo performance as a woman seeking vengeance no matter the cost. Her presiding over the ceremony and execution of Ironfist was amazing. Unfortunately, she had to leave early due to issues with her pets and the ones she was sitting. Lupin played in character on many levels: bravely tackling the giant Hornet, scarfing up free food, her insolence toward Sariel, and fear of Liches. As well as her trying to talk Amidaeus out of her plot and convincing Egad to protest. Lobis’ introduction was interesting. Seemingly, knowledgeable and experienced, he also seemed in awe and naïve in many things. His various fighting styles may have the others confused as to his class. Henrick tried to support his friends and play peacemaker with various NPCs. His one-on-one duel with the rocky brute was an awesome battle between magic and muscle. Don’t ever think mages can’t hold their own against physical assaults. Erith was his curious self. Turning into a mouse to gather information and causing a diversion to help out Lupin, he blinked out in mid-battle as his phone died and never returned for the rest of the session. Dimva was his roguish self. Trying to pick pockets, he had an encounter with his old nemesis Scarlet. Standing up to object to the marriage, the Daffy Dwarf’s roll playing came to a stop when the phone he was sharing with Erith went out. Only briefly returning toward the end. Bravo to all!!!
Egad—Male Orc Bard. First introduced as my PC in Dungeons and Darkness. This tremendous troubadour most recently backed up The Heroes against the Brides of Chronos (see Secret Agendas).
Felyndra—Female Drow Sorceress. In Lobis’ own words: A beautiful Drow sorceress name Felyndra. A crush and someone that has misled and influenced him into helping with her schemes in the past.
Hand of Chronos—5 members of various classes that serve as Lord Chronos elite shock troopers. Known as The Hand of Chronos, you will meet them in the upcoming Tales of the Crimson Empire: The First, First Mission. Written about three years ago, you are experiencing a bit of a time flux as you now met them before their actual debut.
Malachi—Male Elf Rogue. In Amidaeus' own words (also, the reason she seeks revenge on Nagleth Ironfist): Hello, my name is Amidaeus (pronounced Amy-dae-us) and I’m currently trying to save my elvish ass.
I was raised in Bentum Town, an average-sized elven village which sits half covered by a massive Banyan tree. My father Devir was a jewelry merchant, able to craft exquisite pieces that were much in demand from high-born nobles’ country wide. I would work for him when I wasn’t studying to be a cleric of Sahnine like my mother Elina.
That all changed when an Orc raiding party, led by Nagleth the Fighter (hearing of my father’s talents and the riches he had) ransacked the town, burned my home, and murdered my parents. That day began my violent hatred of Orcs and of Nagleth in particular. I swore that one day I would steal from the shadows like the rogues and drive my sword through his chest. Since both of parents were dead and I had no one else in the town, I was forced to fend for myself. I began my life of crime by picking the pockets of anyone I could get close to; since I was a pretty child, that happened a lot. After meeting my lover Malachi, I learned how to steal into the nobles’ homes to take their jewelry. I would take my ill-gotten goods to the southernmost edge of the tree’s shade and pawn it at the pawn stand there. And using my wit and beauty to charm a few extra coins out of the old guy’s pocket. The money I’ve received has gone towards furthering my goal of assassinating Nagleth. I’ve bought pristine weapons (dual short swords and a long bow) and supple leather clothing that makes a whisper of a sound and hides my autumn orange hair. I’ve also given offerings to Zehir religiously, hoping that he would grant me the skills that I need to slide my blade between Nagleth’s armor.
As to why I’m running for my life...that jerk sold me out! I had recently pawned some silver bracelets that I had stolen from the Mayor’s Wife. When I went to the same pawn stand later to pawn something completely unrelated and I found out from the guy that stands on the corner that the pawn owner had sold me out to the guards! I managed to escape Bentum Town with an hour to spare before the guards came to my little hovel looking for me. I ran to the next town over, hoping to use some of my coins to get a room for the night while I figured out what to do. While trying to find a small room, I ran into a crowd of people listening to some guy up on a stage. I couldn’t pass up the chance to pickpocket a few extra coins (after all, a few coins might mean another night in the room...or a pastry). While I was picking pockets, minding my own business, the guy “volunteered” me to go and kill some dragon. Since this is NOT my cup of tea, I resolved to jump on the next adventurer’s caravan out of there and here I am!
General Nagleth Ironfist—Male Orc Warlord. Mentioned way back in Chapter two (see The Journey Home), General Ironfist was the one who Murdered Wanda’s family and village. His first name, Nagleth was retconned in to mesh with Amedaeus’ back story.
Pyter—Male Human Noble. Scarlet’s bloated, befuddled fiancé. A free re-roll for the first player who can identify this very briefly before mentioned character.
Sariel—Female Eladrin Warlord. In Lupin’s own words:
Name: Sariel
Race: Eladrin
Gender: Female
Age: 147
Class: Warlord
Occupation: Head of the military faction in Corden, my home town
Relationship: Poor
Reason: We have a highly antagonistic history. Since I grew up on the streets, I was always stealing things, trying to find food to eat or something I could sell for money. As head of the military Sariel and her subordinates were always trying to catch me and anyone else who broke the law in any way, shape, or, form. Sariel is, in fact, an Eladrin as strange and out of place as that might seem. I don’t know why or how she came to our town, but there were many rumors about her arrogant ass that were passed around in the slums of our city. Some people said she was kicked out of her home for disobeying her leaders, others say she left in order to bring peace and beauty to our world, highly unlikely. Even others say that she is a princess run away from home, curious to learn about this world and all that is in it. I think it’s all a load of crap and what ever the reason she came to Corden I don’t care or don’t have any intention of ever asking her about it, if I ever even see her stupid face again. She’d sooner see me dead or imprisoned for the rest of my life for all the trouble I caused her and her soldiers before I left Corden, and I’d love to see her one day knocked down off of her high and mighty horse and dragged through the mud.
(Side note: Sariel isn’t actually as bad as Lupin is making her out to be, Sariel was just trying to do a just and effective job to keep the city safe and under the law. Because Lupin was one of those under “attack” by Sariel she sees her as this bitchy high and mighty being with a stick up her ass.)
History: Sariel did not pay Lupin much mind when she was younger, at that point Lupin was only trying to find ways to help herself and her elderly dwarven guardian survive. Sariel only began focusing on Lupin as she grew older, went back to living on the streets and became more of a problem. By then Lupin had developed better skills and found one or two companions to help her hit larger targets and get the occasional drop on some of the merchants that might pass through town. Corden wasn’t a metropolis by any means but it was still large enough that Sariel would have a hard time finding/catching Lupin once she disappeared. To try and combat this and to honestly try to help Lupin out Sariel offered Lupin the opportunity to join the Corden guard on a trial basis. Lupin accepted but had a rough time being a known thief on top of being a Tiefling in a town where that was rare. Around 4-5 months after Lupin joined, Sariel, in an attempt to have Lupin prove her loyalty and become a fully fledged member of the guard, asked Lupin to provide information about who Lupin had worked with over the years and expose their hideaways and escape routes. Lupin’s response to that request was to leave the guard that same night, stealing Sariel’s elven boots as a sort of final f**k you. That’s when Lupin finally left Corden for good, traveled around for a year before hearing and joining up with the UNITED.
Circling back to the above side note, a lot of what Sariel was doing was with good intentions, but because Lupin had spent so much time trying to avoid getting caught and had already listed Sariel as her ‘enemy’, Lupin interpreted a lot of Sariel’s actions as either accusatory or trying to use Lupin to take down others like her. It is unclear how that and Lupin’s final actions towards Sariel will affect things if they ever meet again in the future.
Scarlet—Female Human Rogue. First introduced in Perfidia, this voluptuous villain enticed Dimva to leave The Heroes. A horrible heist gone wrong led to an encounter with Rakshasas.
Wolfram—Male Human Lich Sorcerer. First introduced in the Tales of the Crimson Empire: First Mission, this undead evil has been battling The United for decades. The Heroes have encountered him twice before (see Eyebeam and Brides and Prejudice) but have always avoided prolong battles by strategically withdrawing/scampering away.
What really happened: Lots of unexpected events changed everything. Since they were now without a cleric, I added Egad as an emergency PPO. I had mentioned in his bio that Egad was in love with Buttercup, never realizing that he would be involved in this adventure. Amidaeus’ death touch was not supposed to be so powerful, but because she missed the session where Lady Die’s boons were explained, I forgot to mention that to her, so there was no chance for Ironfist’s monologue about why he did what he did. if Wolfram couldn't be stopped, Felyndra was going to hand the eye of petrification to Lobis, but Lupin’s wishing coin negated that. Because three party members dropped out, the fifth member of the hand was never revealed (can you guess who it was from the list of guest?). Despite all of the unexpected twist and turns, it played out into an even better story than planned, complete with a happily ever after Orcish Wedding!
* Non-Consonants: Vowels.
** Better than Good Bodies of Water: Great Lakes.
*** Used to Percieve: Senses.
**** Walls of a Military Complex: – Pentagon.
***** Hand Digits: Fingers.
****** Stubble on Face: – 5 o’clock shadow.
******* Michael and His Brothers: Jackson 5.
******** Short Rest: Take 5.
********* Perfume: Chanel No. 5.
********** Sci-Fi Space Station: Babylon 5.
*********** Subway Sale: $5 foot-long.
************ Island State’s Police: Hawaii 5-0.
Next: Chapter 42 - Fight or Flight
Previous: Chapter 40 - Life & Death