Three players were present:
Garrus Ironside, Male Dwarf Cleric
Lupin Damakos, Female Tiefling Rogue + Willow, Cat Animal Companion
Henrick, Male Human Warlock
A brief explanation. Mini-Adventures are what we play when there are two to three PCs, or when key players who are pivotal to the plot are absent. Mini-Adventures are one-off stories, while not part of our campaign (or a campaign unto itself), there is some consistency and reoccurring NPCs.
Suddenly, six Crow-like humanoids, Kenkus, surround Garrus. Demanding that he return their idol, the Kenku prepare to fight. Garrus shocks everyone by actually talking to the birdmen. Proclaiming his innocence, Garrus tries to ascertain what they are looking for, and who the real perpetrators are. A winged, female, Kenku alights behind a shocked Hendrick and enquires why he is hiding.
Lupin uses her stealth to scamper into the woods to flank the brutish brothers. While Henrick conceals himself (Does anyone else sense a pattern here?). The Oni (Onii?) warn The Heroes to stay out of their way. Garrus, again, tries to glean some information out of the two ogre-like oafs. Demanding to know why they are stealing the statue, The Heroes discover that the Oni have been hired by someone with two heads and one body, or one body and two heads. When Garrus asks them to describe the looks of the person(s) who hired them, the Oni reply that they look like him: Ugly, and proceed to mock him with uproarious guffaws.
The back and forth battle rages, as poor dice rolls dominate the fates of friends and foes alike. Downing the first Oni, The Heroes converge on the second. Pummeled by a combo-plate of magic and might, the pilfering poltroon promptly perishes. Searching the Oni for treasure, Lupin unleashes two giant swarms of rats. Though vile, the vicious vermin are verily vanquished.
With the Oni (Onii) defeated, The Heroes examine the parcel they were carrying. Wrapped in a magical cloth, bound with mystic wards, they must solve a series of horrible puns to unwrap the idol.
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 1: Urines and Diamonds.*
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 2: One Gus too Many.**
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 3: Fantastic Plate.***
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 4: Final Jump in Pool.****
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 5: Charming Tuber.*****
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 6: Hindu Goddess’ Blossom.******
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 7: Spill.*******
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 8: Southern Girl’s Sneeze Inducer.********
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 9: Newborn Chicken Factory.*********
HORRIBLE SPRING/VEGETABLE PUN NUMBER 10: Two-Piece Swimsuits for Many Exotic Animals.**********
The bi-beast demands The Heroes turn over the idol. He (They?) claim that it was his (theirs?) originally, and that the Kenku had stolen it. When asked to prove it, by telling them what the idols name is, the large lout sputters: “Woodina???” Sensing that he (they) are lying, The Heroes brace for battle. Lupin and Willow flank the gruesome giant for a tag-team attack. In a synchronized strike, Garrus cast a sacred field that heals The Heroes each turn; Henrick cast an overlapping field that inflicts damage on the huge horror. Though the twin-titan dishes out a respectable amount of damage, Garrus’ healing field negates most of the injuries. Unable to disengage from the flanking foes, the evil Ettin slowly drops in hit points, while The Heroes remain at full health.
As a cleric of Kord, Garrus quickly refuses the evil entity. Playing upon Lupin’s demonic heritage, the skull tries to entice her, but the teen-aged Tiefling rejects the corrupt cranium. Offering him great power (+5 to hit AND damage), plus mentioning how much fun they could have together, Henrick waivers back and forth on the offer. The wicked warlock really wants the power (and cool skull mask) it offers, but is conflicted. After much debate (in character and out), Henrick accepts the skull’s offer. Upon donning the malevolent mask, Henrick begins to refer to himself in the third-person plural.
The Heroes are conflicted, they want to let Coni go, but they also want to collect the reward they were promised. Coni informs The Heroes that the Kenku are thieves and highway men, and that no one would mind if The Heroes killed them and took their ill-gotten gold. Lupin groans that, that was her idea in the first place. The Heroes want to chop down a tree and wrap it in the mystic cloth to present to the Kenkus, so they can infiltrate their camp. A disapproving glare from Coni convinces The Heroes to find a dead tree for their subterfuge. Armed with their Trojan tree, The Heroes set off toward the Kenku’s hideout.
Thoughts on this Session: In my humble opinion, this was one of the most fun sessions we ever played. Everyone actually played in character. There was even interaction with the npcs!!! I honestly hadn’t prepared much backstory or characteristics for them because, most of the time, The Heroes use their shoot-first, ask questions never diplomacy. I was caught off guard, and had to tweak the plot and personalities of the npcs. The whole demonic skull segue came on the fly! When Henrick began to refer to himself as “We”, after donning the demonic skull, well, that was just the icing on the cake for me. So much more fun than merely battling monsters! Bravo to all!!!
* Urines and Diamonds: Urines = Pees; diamonds = karats – Peas and Carrots.
** One Gus too Many: Too many = spare; Gus = gus – Asparagus.
*** Fantastic Plate: Fantastic = rad; plate = dish – Radish.
**** Final Jump in Pool: Final = end; jump in pool = dive – Endive.
***** Charming Tuber: Charming = sweet; tuber = potato – Sweet Potato.
****** Hindu Goddess’ Blossom: Hindu Goddess = Kali; blossom = flower – Cauliflower.
******* Spill: Spill = leak – Leek.
******** Southern Girl’s Sneeze Inducer: Southern Girl = belle; sneeze inducer = pepper – Bell Pepper.
********* Newborn Chicken Factory: Newborn chicken = egg; factory = plant – Eggplant
********** Two-Piece Swimsuits for Many Exotic Animals: Many exotic animals = zoo; two-piece swimsuit = bikini – Zucchini.
Each Player received a random Drama Card for solving a pun.